Friday, May 15, 2009

I Am A Dilemma

Hi! I am 6 weeks old. I live in the warm protection of my mother’s womb. Yesterday we went to the doctor’s clinic. To check whether I am a girl or a boy. I don’t know what that means. But it must be something important. My mother wept a lot after the test. I heard my father scream at her for producing “only girls”.

After we went home, there was more screaming and shouting. I barely managed to survive when my mother was slapped and pushed around by my grandmother. They called my mother a worthless bitch who could not give them an heir. They were talking something about carrying on the family name. I don’t know what that means. But again, it must be important.

Later, when my mother was about to fall asleep, my father started talking about “abortion”. He was talking very sweetly to my mother. I was very happy to hear his pleasant voice at that time. He was saying that with his limited income, they could not afford to have another daughter. Though I don’t know what “daughter” is, they already have one, I think. My father mentioned some “wedding expenses”. Then my mother started weeping. I did not understand anything that was being said. But I felt very sad to hear my mother cry.

Today morning, I heard my mother tell my father that she does not want “abortion”. She said something about taking up a job to meet expenses also. Then my father got very angry and started beating her again. I was so scared! I don’t like to hear my parents fighting. I wish I was out there, so that I could help them in some way.

I don’t know why they keep fighting about this “abortion”. Why does my father want it? And why does my mother not want it? I have a feeling that it has something to do with me. Last night, I could hear my mother talking to me. She was promising me that she would not get an abortion.

What do you think will happen? Will my mother be able to have her way? Or will she give in to those beatings and get the abortion? I think she will get it. She does not seem to be very brave…

Can you help my mother?

Thursday, May 14, 2009

One Vice...

If there is a depravity that I can be accused of, it is “Shopping”. Like most women, I just love to shop. I am a firm believer in the “retail therapy” and know from experience that it is better at stress busting than caffeine or even sugar. I am the happiest when I am trying out new shoes or clothes. Is that a really bad thing? To be so materialistic…can’t be good, right?

The worst thing is that I chide Di for impulsive buying, while I myself am hooked to it. Often I buy clothes just because “it’s a great bargain”! So as a result, my closet is always bursting with clothes that are rarely worn. I have to give away absolutely new clothes to make space for more new clothes!!!

Now if that isn’t stupidity, what is?

Egging me on, is my dear lovable husband. He knows about my fetish for shoes and allows nothing to stand in the way. So every time we are in a market, he offers to buy me new shoes. Every single time!

I have been trying to work on this for the last few months, and am very happy to announce that I have not bought any shoes in the last 2 months. Yippeeeee! I did buy some clothes two weeks back, but the good thing is that I am wearing those.