Friday, April 17, 2009

Dancing in the rain...

Yesterday I was thinking about what makes me tick. What makes me happy? Did the new pair of jeans I bought at Pantaloons last Sunday make me happy? Does an expensive dinner at a fancy restaurant make me happy? Movies? Writing? Reading? TV? The sales and marketing work that I do?

No. None of this makes me happy. Sure, I enjoy these things.. maybe take some pleasure in them too. But they don't make me happy. So, what does?

I explored the insides of my mind to find the answer. I was surprised to find that I had to make an effort to recall the last time I felt truly happy/overjoyed. When I enjoy all these things, howcome I don't remember much about where I went, what I wore or what I did last week? It seems so insignificant...

What I do remember is the happiness and plain joy I felt in Dehradun. I know why I love Doon so much. It's because I love the rains. Every time I am in the rains, I feel like dancing. Sometimes I do give in...

Anyway, my happiest memories are of watching a rainbow as a child, my father insisting on my wearing a raincoat as I am leaving for school, splashing my way through the big puddles of water with friends, relishing hot pakoras and chai with my husband...and so on.

The joy and happiness I remember even today is all in the little things of life. I wonder why I have stopped experiencing the joy of little inconsequential things? Why do I put so much thought, effort and money into enjoying life? Why does everything have to be bigger and important? Why am I not content with just watching the rainbow, instead of chasing it?

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